Helping An Alcoholic: Tips to Create Success
There are few things in life that can tear a family apart like an alcoholic. It’s such a gradual process that by the time it gets out of hand, the pain that goes along with it can be strong enough to destroy a family. Living with an alcoholic is a difficult experience. But when enough is enough, help is possible. Playing the waiting game doesn’t always work. Sometimes helping an alcoholic discover the need for help is the first of many steps towards recovery.
Looking for excuses is any addict’s first defense. Stress, money, and family problems are all reasons alcoholics give to drink. But if used tactfully, they can also be reasons to stop. An alcoholic, or any addict, who does not want help will never truly be able to recover. Finding a vulnerable place for them to open up to the possibility of recovery is the most difficult. Never use ultimatums. They don’t work. Most of the time they only make the situation worse. Patience is the key.
Have a plan. Research programs and facilities, talk to recovering alcoholics to find what their turning point was, talk to family and friends to help.
A method that has worked with some alcoholics is the picture method. A recovering alcoholic stated his wife taped pictures of their family including children and parents on the bottles of whisky he loved. The pictures had “We miss you” written on them. The recovering alcoholic stated it took several weeks but he finally knew that getting help was the best thing for his family. Another method is getting the alcoholic interested in something besides drinking. Whether it’s an activity the alcoholic liked to do but got away from or a new interest, it’ll get their mind off of alcohol.
Once the alcoholic is willing to accept treatment, finding an appropriate treatment program is the next step. Most programs follow the traditional and proven 12 step program that includes an unbiased sponsor to assist during and after the process. Most treatments for alcoholics do not require staying in a treatment facility but some programs encourage inpatient treatment to allow the alcoholic to focus solely on recovery. Every alcoholic is different so research is needed before deciding on which facility and program to use. If one doesn’t work, then make sure to pick an alternative program so the transition is delayed and the alcoholic has an opportunity to find a more suitable program for recovery.
During and even after treatment, a change in lifestyle and/or living situation may be needed to keep temptation away. If friends and family members are not willing to withhold alcohol from events and gatherings, they may need to not be near the alcoholic for a time. Relapse is a frightening word to any recovering addict. Always make sure to keep in constant contact with the sponsor and program coordinator, especially if a relapse happens.
Helping an alcoholic can be a challenging endeavor but with a clear plan, a good program, and a willing participant, recovery is possible.
From observing my family, I have to say that helping an alcoholic really involves getting someone into a 30 day rehab program most of the time. It is hard to kick the drinking pattern alone, especially if it’s been a family ingrained habit across generations. There is just too much baggage involved. It is too tempting if at every family gathering people are getting drunk and use alcohol to even have a conversation.